Look doesn't matter...
TV is getting bombarded w/ reality shows for the past few years.
Isn't living life enough of a reality without having to watch it on TV as well?
I don't like reality TV shows a bit. OK… I used to watch Real World on MTV, that was probably b/c there are things that I can relate too. Since we are all about the same age w/ the same problems. I think I learned the most about myself was w/ Real World Paris! NO MORE Real world for me, since I wasn’t too fond of the San Diego one. I think the show is getting old, or maybe I’m the one getting old ! haha…
Currently: I've literally stopped watching reality shows!Though I don’t watch much to begin with. Actually I haven’t watched too much TV at all, except for the News and Jeopardy - when I get the chance. =P
=O What is it with reality TV shows? There are so many of them out at the moment. But does anyone watch them? I find them so ridiculous, especially those stupid dating ones like The Average Joe and Joe Millionnaire. I think dating shows are a ridiculous idea, they always say that looks don't matter and it's the personality that matters, but they always end up choosing the most good - looking person. Don’t they?
=( I don't know what these people are thinking when they get themselves on these kinds of shows. They now even have extreme makeover shows, like Swan Princess, where they do plastic surgery and nips and tucks. But isn't plastic surgery an actual surgery with risks? A lot of people disagree w/ plastic surgery, but I think whatever makes you happy then go for it ! We can offer opinions and express our thoughts -- But @ the end, we don’t really have a say, b/c it’s not our body nor life to control !
^_^ Thanks Charlie for the comment. Funny thing is that I never thought my blogs was inspirational at all. =) Just need a place where I can FLESH OUT my personal thoughts. But If it makes a difference to some folks – Wow! *_~ That would be great ! SoOorry, It's almost 3:30 am! I better go to sleep! Good nite ya!
Posted by Sindy on Thursday, September 23, 2004 at 3:26 AM
I need to go on a vacation !
Argggh !!!! I'm so f*** tired at the moment!I didn't sleep until almost 4am last nite - just up thinking.I hurry and rushed out of bed at 7am, b/c I thought I was late..
Instead I found myself waiting till 7:30am ! Half asleep and awake..
I was in a really weird mood last night. Sorta lonely, but not really...
Sorta bored, but not really... Sorta wanting to be in a new place and time altogether...But not really. Lately I've been feeling like I just want to take a break from being me. I want to have some actual time off, as opposed to whatever my "time off" is now... Which is usually time where I'm having to do something I couldn't do earlier because I had other things to do. Now, don't get me wrong... I love all the things I do. Really. I wouldn't trade it for the world. I'd just love a little break. (ok.. I need a BIG break !)That's it. Whining done. ( Sorry if I have confused you! It’s not meant to be understood… )
I need to go on a vacation! I was just thinking that the most fun trip I've been on was when I went to Vegas last summer. Don't get me wrong, I had fun last time too and I had fun on the other trips - I've been on.... but that was the most fun. Looking at the rest of this year, I only have plans to go to LA for a weekend and that's about it. I think LA will be an relaxing trip, but I'd like to go away somewhere for a week. Most likely not.. Hopefully I will go away for a few weeks to Europe the coming Summer or HOng Kong first then Europe in end of 2006 or early 2007. I don't know about the dates until Feb. 2006.
pS. Last but not least, I like the fact that people - I don't know left me email me about blogs…
Posted by Sindy on Wednesday, September 22, 2004 at 7:10 PM
Beautifully written. Very inspirational. Keep up the blogs and do not fear what people may think of you. Keep up with the writing, because it will help you relieve whatever is on your mind. Even with a few sentences of your blogs you will inspire people by your kind words.
Posted by charlie on Thursday, September 23, 2004 at 1:09 AM
I just want CHANGE !
=( I'm not really sure what to do with my life. I mean there are some good things going but also many not-so-good things that are lingering on. I can go on and on and list them all but that would be a waste of time. What might work is if I go ahead and start planning and doing things to rid myself of the bad things in my life.
I've never really expressed private ideas in public, or to anyone else really. Only occasionally I've been able to express how I truly felt about anything. I don't know exactly why I'm starting to be able to now, but I'm guessing it has to do with this blog.
I don't really want to offend anyone though, so I won't go into any details. Its unfortunate that since the people closest to me are pretty much the only people near me at all, it only figures that both good and bad things tend to stem from them somehow. Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to place any blame on anybody but .. myself.. . I don't even think I'm trying to place blame on myself. I just want CHANGE.
Life is full of mysteries and although I don't claim to understand any of it, I have a feeling that what I'm thinking of now is more clear than I've ever thought of it. I don't know yet exactly what or how I'm going to change, but I will guarantee (which I don't usually do) that it will be for the better, and I will be a better person, and the people near me will become better.
On the other hand, I hate to say things like this because it usually means that I'll try at first and then fail at it, and pretend to not care about it anymore and just get worse off. I've seen this happen to myself in the past and I really hate that it did happen. I don't know yet why it's happened either, which makes things that much worse.
What I need is a way to keep to my commitment, and that's where this blog comes in. By publishing my ideas and feelings somewhere that people can read them and understand me better, helps me. Its not even that anyone understands me, I don't care if anybody else understands me but myself.
What matters is that I'm able to organize my feelings and thoughts somewhere, which lets me straighten them out. Until now, my thoughts have been lost in the void of my mind, and they've been replaced by other segments of data, either useless or important. They've never really had a way to stay on top or be prioritized properly.
I'm actually really glad for this!!!! To everyone else reading this, I don't care what you think of me now that you have read my innermost thoughts and what not, I feel like I'm becoming a better person already. Instead of being depressed, I can just type away for a few minutes and feel better. Who needs to pay lots of money for therapy?
Reality's a freaking bitch.
For no apparent reason, I was thinking that this blog thing might be a useful for me.
BUT… Why can't I start writing? Especially when I can't stop thinking…
Warning: I'm feeling pissy.
*** You know, sometimes I think everything is just fucked up.
Sometimes you get so bottled up with frustration at everything in general
that you lash out for no good reason. That's probably not a good thing !
(Geez! Sound like I have a problem! Whateva..)
I used to drive around at night a lot. Sometimes at one ot two in the morning by myself.I start thinking about traveling somewhere or imagine I’m could actually move away from everyone.Somehow it just relaxes and calm me down. …. Lately… though, I haven't been driving barely at all..
I don't even wonder about my sleep patterns anymore. I just get up when I get up, go to sleep when I go to sleep,and I don't count hours. (The first thing I used to do in the morning when I'd wake up was look at my alarm clock and subtract to figure out how long I'd slept. If it wasn't exactly six hours, I'd be annoyed at myself. Dumb, huh?)
That's it ! No more blogging today, dammit!
Thank you and good night ya…
Yes, life bites - bite back harder !
Trust can be a fragile… - and so very easily broken !
Lies, deceit, manipulation, slander, rumors, cheating, adultery, and so on.
All of these break trust - putting up such a huge wall that will take such a long time to tear down. Do we respect our friends so little that we would break the trust between us. The shooting pain of uncovered lies so much more painful than the sincere truth!
We are self centered, which I have learned that the truths are inevitable. Why must we be so proud that we would put ourselves ahead of our friends... How arrogant and conceited of us to do so! It can take a friendship back to square one - or even destroy it.
How self-centered it is to forget a friend. To claim that a friend means so much to you, and then to do such a repulsive thing as break that friend's trust! It sounds so careless. (Doesn't it?) People say they care about me, but even that is now in question. Am I free from lies myself ? No, of course not.
=I I’m fed up when I come to realize what I've said....
Trust, when broken, takes a very long time to rebuild...
for now, each level built must be so carefully inspected, even examined.
